having a pretty high tolerance for discomfort means you sometimes will put up with too much. other times it opens you up to profound experience that other people don’t even realize they’re missing out on. what I’m saying is you should be able to sleep on a floor every once in a while. but you definitely shouldn’t opt for it.
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it’s easy to mistake thinking about yourself too much for introspection. people think they have to push on, further and further inward. really, you want to do the opposite. it’s helpful to zoom out and understand the larger context you’re in, what character you play, how nicely you interact with others. that’s introspection - the emotional and psychological survey. it’s not about the innermost thoughts and feelings. it’s what’s expressed.
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we need a linear concept of time to communicate with each other. but the way we actually experience our lives I imagine as a sort of radiating center connecting lots of different moments, we jump in and out of them. and these radiating lines are connected somehow to the linear narrative. that I can’t even really visualize.
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there is an extremely bruised pear rolling around in the fridge drawer, reminding me of a simpler time - when I thought I would possible make/ eat a poached pear. i’m older now, wiser in some ways.