love you like the old days

another old poem, 2018

falling asleep / and i'm on the phone letting you do the talking / the reminiscing / as i hide the animal noises of my crying as you say to me / “do you remember smoking cigarettes in your apartment in milwaukee / or your couches? / god those were the worst most unfucking comfortable couches / there was no way to sit on them / i remember watching,, what was it called? taxi driver / with deniro / and it was raining outside / but we were on top of each other on those horrible couches / and my legs were up on your coffee table / and remember / these good times / when i had a fever / one hundred and three degrees / but you'd convinced me it'd be better to be sick with you / so i took a bus / and you were late to pick me up / and i nearly died in the sun / but it was all okay / because you carried my bag / and traced my back / and left for a party in the night but came back / to curl up against me / remember the other good times / when the last german church on the block / set fire / because its bricks were so saturated with centuries old smog / and you held my hand / as we looked at its skeleton / what a crazy day that was / when i ate the entire cake / that was in your fridge / and your room mate didn't notice / or get mad / she would've killed you / if she thought it was you but somehow because it was me / it was okay / i don't know how i ate an entire cake / how funny it is sometimes when the consequences escape us / or the good time / when i had you run! / while i took panorama photos on my phone / so you'd appear in the photos twice / sometimes with a squished face or missing arm / elongated and transfigured sure / but it was still you